- The host is traditionally a friend or a sister rather than the parents-to-be, and the first line should say so.
- Two dates matter and only one belongs at the top: the shower date is the invitation, the due date is context.
- The gift line is the hardest sentence on the card. Write it in words you would say aloud, and put the long version on the guest page.
- Say who the shower is for — women only, couples, or children welcome — or half your guests will guess wrong.
- The reply line needs a date, a way and a number of guests. 'Let us know' is not a reply line.
What a baby shower invitation must say
A shower carries an unusual amount of ambiguity: who is hosting, who is invited, whether to bring anything, and what happens once everyone arrives. Answer these eight things and the messages afterwards will be about parking.
- Who is hosting, and how to reach them.
- Who the shower is for, by name.
- The day, the date, the start time and roughly when it ends.
- The address in full, including the floor and the bell.
- Who is invited: one name, a couple, or a family with children.
- What to bring, or that nothing is expected.
- The gift line, in one sentence.
- How to reply and by when.
Who is hosting, and how the parents are named
Traditionally the shower is thrown by a friend, a sister or an aunt rather than by the parents-to-be, on the reasoning that you do not invite people to a party at which you are given presents. The convention has loosened, but it still shapes the wording: when someone else hosts, the invitation can be warm about the gifts; when the parents host, the gift line has to be gentler, and 'no gifts' becomes the honest thing to write.
Name the person the shower is for the way her friends say it, not the way a bank does. If both parents are being celebrated, name both, and put the host's name where a guest can find it in a hurry.
Please join us for a baby shower in honour of Sofia Almeida, hosted by her sister Ines.
Kasia and Marta invite you to a baby shower for their friend Lena.
We are throwing Anna a baby shower, and it would not be the same without you.
Join us in celebrating Lena and Bram, and the small person arriving in June.
We are having a baby, and we would love an afternoon with you before it arrives.
Thomas and I are hosting our own shower, which means no games and very good cake.
Hosted by Nils and Clara at 14 Lindenstrasse — Sofia thinks she is coming for lunch.
The due date, the shower date and the reply-by date
Three dates come up and only one belongs at the top. The shower date is the invitation. The due date is context — it explains why the party is in April, and it helps anyone buying clothes pick a size — so it earns a short line, not the headline.
Hold the shower four to eight weeks before the due date, and set the reply-by date ten days to two weeks before the shower, because somebody is buying food and needs a number.
The reply line needs a date, one way to answer and a note of what to include. On a digital invitation the form is part of the page: a guest opens the link or scans the code, says how many are coming and adds anything they cannot eat, in a browser, with no app and no account. The date you set closes the form, and the page reads in any of nine languages.
Saturday 18 April, from two o'clock — baby due in early June.
The baby is due on 2 June. The cake is on 18 April.
Please reply by 8 April so we know how many cups to put out.
RSVP by 8 April — tap the link and tell us if you are bringing anyone.
Let Ines know by 8 April, and say if there is anything you do not eat.
Formal wording
Formal wording turns up more often than people expect, usually when the guest list has grandmothers and colleagues on it rather than only friends. It is the third person, no contractions, the date written out, and one restrained sentence about gifts.
Mrs Marta Nowak requests the pleasure of your company at a baby shower in honour of her daughter, Kasia, on Saturday, the eighteenth of April, at two o'clock in the afternoon.
You are warmly invited to a baby shower for Sofia Almeida, at the home of Ines Almeida, 14 Rua das Flores.
Please join us in honouring Lena and Bram before the arrival of their first child.
Kindly respond to Ines by the eighth of April.
A list has been left with Bakker and Sons, should you wish to use it.
Modern wording
Modern wording is the register most showers actually want: the first person, the host's own voice, the facts underneath in a short block. A shower is a small afternoon, and small afternoons sound wrong in ceremonial language.
We're throwing Anna a baby shower. Saturday 18 April, from two, at mine.
Baby Kaminski arrives in June. Come and eat cake about it in April.
An afternoon for Sofia before everything changes — Saturday 18 April, two until five.
No theme, no games, just lunch for Ida and the people she likes.
Drop in any time between two and five, and stay as long as you like.
Playful wording
Playful wording sits more comfortably on a shower than on almost any other invitation, and the usual rule still holds: the joke lives in the first line, and the address underneath stays straight.
A baby is brewing. Come and help us wait!
Sofia has grown an entire person. Come and admire the work.
Ready to pop, and so is the prosecco — for everyone except the guest of honour.
Tiny socks, big cake, one afternoon. Saturday 18 April.
Bram has read four books and is still not ready. Help us prepare him.
Come for the nappies, stay for the sandwiches.
The gift line, and its four alternatives
This is the sentence hosts rewrite six times. It is hard because a shower is, structurally, a party at which people bring things, and saying so out loud feels like asking. Say it plainly, in one sentence, and put anything longer somewhere else.
There are five honest positions — a list at a shop, and its four alternatives — and the wording follows whichever one is true. Pick one: a card offering all of them at once reads as a shopping list.
Sofia's list is at Bakker and Sons, if you would like to use it.
There is a wish list on the invitation page. Please treat it as a suggestion, not a bill.
Instead of a card, bring a book for the shelf and write a note inside the cover.
Bring a packet of nappies in any size — we are trying to fill a cupboard.
A nappy raffle: one packet, one ticket, and a bottle of wine to be won.
No gifts, please. Lena would rather have the company.
Ida is not registering anywhere. A meal for the freezer is worth ten babygrows.
| What you want | How to say it | Where the detail goes |
|---|---|---|
| A list at a shop | "Sofia's list is at Bakker and Sons, if you would like to use it." | The link on the invitation page, not on the card |
| An online wish list | "There is a wish list on the page below — please treat it as a suggestion." | One link, kept up to date by the parents |
| Books instead of cards | "Bring a book for the shelf instead of a card, and write in the front of it." | One line; add "any book you loved" if anyone asks |
| Nappies | "Bring a packet of nappies in any size and we will call it done." | Sizes only if someone asks; the cupboard takes them all |
| Nothing at all | "No gifts, please — Lena would rather have the company." | Nowhere. A no-gifts line needs no page behind it |
Women only, couples, or the whole family
Three shapes are common and they are not interchangeable: an afternoon for women, a couples' shower with both parents and both sets of friends, and a family afternoon with children running through it. Guests who guess wrong arrive with a husband and a four-year-old.
The wording carries it in two places: who the invitation is addressed to, and one plain line about who else is welcome. Some hosts also use the afternoon to tell people whether it is a boy or a girl; one neutral line covers that, and the rest of the card stays about the shower.
An afternoon for Sofia and her friends — women only, and nobody will make you play anything.
This one is just for the women in Kasia's life.
A couples' shower: bring your other half, and there is beer as well as tea.
Partners welcome, children welcome, dogs regrettably not.
A family afternoon — the garden is open and there are plenty of small people to play with.
Adults only, please. This is the last quiet afternoon Lena will get for a while.
Games, or a line saying there will be none
Games are the most divisive part of a shower and the most easily settled on the invitation. Guests who enjoy them want to arrive on time; guests who dread them want to know they can relax.
If a game needs something in advance — a baby photograph, a piece of advice, a guess at the date — the invitation is the only place that request reaches everyone.
There will be games. They are short, and nobody has to win.
No games, no forfeits and no guessing anyone's measurements. Just lunch.
Bring a photograph of yourself as a baby; we are pinning them to the wall.
Write one piece of advice on the card in this envelope and bring it with you.
Guess the date and the weight when you arrive. The winner takes the flowers home.
Sprinkles, second babies and a shower after the birth
A second or third baby usually gets a smaller party, and the wording is what tells guests it is smaller. 'Sprinkle' does the job in two syllables: a shower, but lighter, with less attached. If the word feels twee, say it plainly — a second baby needs a cot sheet and a free afternoon.
Showers after the birth are common now, because the baby is there to be met. Two things change: the baby has a name, and the invitation gives a window rather than a start time, since a new parent's afternoon has a ceiling.
A sprinkle for Kasia, who has done this before and needs nothing but company.
Baby number two is on the way. No presents, no games, just an afternoon in the garden.
Sofia and Mateo are welcoming Emil, born on 2 June. Come and meet him.
A meet-the-baby afternoon: drop in between two and five, stay twenty minutes or two hours.
Ida is home, Emil is asleep, and we would love to see you. Saturday, from three.
Come and meet Nour. Bring nothing — the freezer is full and so is the flat.
Wording mistakes at baby showers
- The due date at the top, where the shower date should be.
- No host named, so nobody knows who to reply to.
- 'Bring a dish' sent by message to some guests and not to others.
- A gift line that reads like an invoice.
- Three gift options on one card, so guests bring one of each.
- No end time, on the one afternoon where an end time is a kindness.
- Nothing said about children, so half the guests bring them and the other half apologise.
- The address without the floor or the bell, because everyone has been before.
- Games kept as a surprise, so the guests who dread them find out at the door.
- A reply-by date two days before the shower, leaving no time to shop.
FAQ
- What do you write on a baby shower invitation?
- Who is hosting, who the shower is for, the day, date, start and finish time, the full address, who is invited, one line about gifts and a reply-by date. That is the whole card; the wish list and the parking belong on the invitation page.
- Who hosts a baby shower?
- Traditionally a friend, a sister or an aunt rather than the parents-to-be, so nobody is inviting people to a party at which they receive presents. Plenty of couples host their own now, which is fine — it just means a gentler gift line.
- How do you word the gift line on a baby shower invitation?
- In one sentence, as an offer rather than an instruction: "Sofia's list is at Bakker and Sons, if you would like to use it." Put the link itself on the invitation page, and never put a shop list, a wish list and a nappy request on one card.
- How do you say no gifts on a baby shower invitation?
- Plainly and once: "No gifts, please — Lena would rather have the company." One or two people will ask anyway, so have an alternative ready in reply: a book for the shelf, a packet of nappies, or a meal for the freezer.
- When should a baby shower be held?
- Four to eight weeks before the due date — late enough to feel real, early enough that the guest of honour is comfortable. Send the invitations three to four weeks ahead and set the reply-by date ten days to two weeks before.
- Do you put the due date on a baby shower invitation?
- Yes, but in a short line rather than at the top. It explains why the shower is when it is, and it helps anyone buying clothes choose a size. The date that belongs in the headline is the shower date.
- How do you invite men to a baby shower?
- Say so in the invitation, because everyone's default assumption is women only. "A couples' shower: bring your other half, and there is beer as well as tea" is enough. Address it to both names, so the line and the envelope agree.
- How do you word a shower after the baby is born?
- Use the baby's name and give a window rather than a start time: "Sofia and Mateo are welcoming Emil, born on 2 June. Drop in between two and five." A new parent's afternoon has a ceiling, and the invitation should protect it.