- Fourteen days out: send the final numbers, then call every supplier with the running order.
- Seven days out: message guests the final details, pay what is due, hand over the rings and the paperwork to named people.
- The day: one running order, one person answering questions, and the couple answering none.
- The emergency kit fits in one bag and is carried by someone who is not getting married.
Fourteen days out
The reply-by date has passed and the count is final. This week turns the count into contracts and the plan into phone calls.
- Send the caterer the final headcount, the menu counts per dish and the dietary list, by their deadline.
- Finish the seating plan from the final guest list; order or print the place cards and the table plan board.
- Write the running order of the day, hour by hour, with a name against every handover.
- Call every supplier: arrival time, setup time, the on-the-day contact and number, the balance due and how it is paid. Send each the running order in writing.
- Confirm the transport: pickup times, addresses, waiting time, the guest coach, how the last guests get home.
- Confirm the civil office or ceremony appointment and take the documents out of the drawer and into the bag.
- Have the final fitting and collect every outfit, including the wedding party's.
- Brief the wedding party, the parents and the readers in writing: where to be, when, and what they hold.
Seven days out
The last week is logistics, and the trick is to give everything to someone else. Whatever the couple is still holding on the morning of the day was handed over too late.
- Message all guests the final details: timings, address, parking, dress code, the guest page link. One short message.
- Pay the balances due before the day; put the on-the-day balances in labelled envelopes with the person named to hand them over.
- Give the rings, the paperwork and the envelopes to their named holders. Not to the couple.
- Pack the day-of kit (below) and the honeymoon bag; check passports and tickets.
- Confirm hair and make-up start times against the running order, working back from the ceremony.
- Break in the shoes; steam the outfits; try everything on once more, together with the accessories.
- Deliver to the venue anything that goes in the room: place cards, table plan, signs, favours, the guest book, the cake stand.
- Sleep. Nothing on this list is worth a night.
The day before
- Rehearse the ceremony if there is a rehearsal: the walk, the positions, the readings, the exit.
- Walk the venue with the coordinator or the person acting as one: where the cars stop, where guests wait, where the photos happen if it rains.
- Charge phones, cameras and the speaker for the ceremony music; put chargers in the kit.
- Confirm the morning: who arrives when, where breakfast is, who has the car keys.
- Put the outfits, the kit, the rings and the documents in one place, and go to bed early.
The day: the running order
One page, printed, held by one person who is not getting married. Every supplier has a copy. The couple's copy is optional; their job is to turn up. The times below are a shape, not a schedule; write yours from the ceremony time backwards and forwards.
| Time | What | Who holds it |
|---|---|---|
| Morning | Hair and make-up; breakfast; photographer arrives for getting ready | Maid of honour / best man |
| Ceremony minus 90 | Wedding party dressed; transport leaves; rings checked | Best man |
| Ceremony minus 30 | Guests arrive; ushers seat; music playing; readers in place | Ushers |
| Ceremony | Entrance, vows, signing, exit; confetti if allowed | Officiant / coordinator |
| After ceremony | Group photos from the shot list; drinks for guests | Photographer / a named family member |
| Reception | Guests seated by the table plan; speeches; meal; cake | Coordinator / master of ceremonies |
| Evening | First dance; band or DJ; evening guests arrive | Band lead / DJ |
| End | Last dance; transport; gifts and cards to a named car; balances paid | Best man / parents |
The emergency kit
One bag, carried by a member of the wedding party, opened perhaps twice. The list is boring on purpose; every item has saved someone's afternoon.
- Sewing kit, safety pins, fashion tape, a stain remover pen, a lint roller.
- Plasters, painkillers, antihistamines, tissues, hand sanitiser.
- Phone chargers and a power bank; a printed running order and the supplier phone list.
- Breath mints, deodorant, a small mirror, hair pins, hairspray.
- Spare tights or socks, flat shoes for the evening, an umbrella.
- Snacks and water for the morning; a straw for the person in the dress.
- The envelopes for balances, the rings if the best man is not holding them yet, the documents.
- A copy of the vows, the readings and the speeches.
What the couple does on the day
Nothing on the list. The point of the fortnight above is that on the day every question already has a name next to it, and that name is not yours. If a supplier calls you, forward them to the person holding the running order. If a guest asks where to park, the guest page answered it. The one job is to be present, and it is harder than it sounds.
FAQ
- What should I do the week before my wedding?
- Confirm every supplier with the running order, message guests the final details, pay balances due before the day, hand the rings and paperwork to named people, pack the day-of kit and deliver to the venue everything that goes in the room. Then sleep.
- What goes in a wedding day emergency kit?
- Sewing kit and safety pins, plasters and painkillers, chargers and a power bank, a printed running order and supplier numbers, mints, tissues, spare tights, flat shoes, an umbrella, snacks and water, and copies of the vows and speeches.
- Who should hold the running order on the day?
- One person who is not getting married: a coordinator if you have one, otherwise the best man or maid of honour. Every supplier has a copy; every question on the day goes to that person.
- When do I send guests the final details?
- About a week before, in one short message with timings, the address, parking, the dress code and the guest page link. Guests who replied online can be messaged from the list.